To the heartbroken girl, I feel you

To the heartbroken girl, I feel you

Dear Heartbroken girl,

I feel you. I understand you. I sympathize with you. You are heartbroken. So am I; at this very moment.

I am sure you have received the comments like “It’s okay” or “You’re going to be okay” or my favorite, “Just move on, he isn’t even worth it.” YIKES. Those are the norm responses we always us girls get. I call those bullshit responses. It is not okay. I am not okay. I can’t just move on so easily. There is no switch I can flip (reference to my TVD fans) to turn off my emotions and not let the heartbreak consume every part of my being. I have learned the hard way that avoiding the situation or pretending that you are not hurt, does not help at all. We can act like we are okay, but then a song comes on the radio that y’all used to sing y’all hearts out too or the hurt feelings that you have been ignoring creep up on you at night when you are alone in your bed and it hits all over again and 10x worse.

WE HAVE TO FEEL AND LET OURSLEVES FEEL IN ORDER TO MOVE ON.

Let yourself feel. Cry it out. Scream it out. You have every right to be hurt. The guy that you thought would stick with you for forever, is gone. Don’t let the “he didn’t even treat your right why are you crying” norm keep you away from feeling your feelings. YOUR FEELINGS ARE VALID. YOUR HURT, IS YOUR HURT. In my situation, I was told constantly that maybe getting cheated on was for the best because I deserved better. In what world should I be happy I got cheated on? I wanted him to be better. I’ll be the first to admit, I let stuff slide that I shouldn’t have, I forgave to easily, I made too many excuses for him; but even knowing all that, does not mean I don’t have a right to be sad. He was my person. My bestfriend. Maybe, I am just too good of a person, but I can’t hate him. He was my partner. He did stuff I shouldn’t have put up with, but people tend to just focus on the bad and not the good. When we were good, I was so happy. I was in love. I saw the stars in his eyes. This is why my heartbreak should be valid despite of what he did or that “I could have left sooner” bs. I am not defending him at all; I am defending my heartbreak.

IT WILL GET BETTER, BUT DON’T LET NO ONE TELL YOU BY WHEN YOU SHOULD FEEL BETTER.

I know it will get better and I am here to tell you it will. However, don’t let anyone tell you by when you should feel better. Heal at your pace. Feel your feelings a week later or a year later. This is YOUR heart break to heal from, no one else’s.

YOU DESERVE THE WORLD, AND YOU CAN GIVE IT TO YOURSELF.

Stay sane my girl, better times are coming. Whether it is today or years later. You will be okay. Don’t let your shine be dull for too long.

Sincerely,

A heartbroken girl

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